Are all people that we call friends our friends?

Good evening to you my dear readers from around the world!

This day could not be more sad than this but I know that by tommorow everything will be fine. Todays topic is on friendships. Why? Well that’s because I don’t feel that I have luck with friends. I am good at finding people that always try to sniff around, mess with me and leave me completely disturbed. I think the planet in Jhyestha nakshatra of my husband is to blame this time though. People feel jealous and go behind my back. If you want me to be more clear, fine I will be.

Since some time I made friends with a girl that is having a high Scorpio energy. For a long time she couldn’t find a guy that she would feel a connection with. I made friends with many guys online but as I wasn’t ready for anything and some of them reminded me of someone I really did want to forget I thanked them for their time. One of the guys I thought would be a good match for that friend of mine and so I’ve introduced them to each other and after a few dates they became a couple. And nothing is wrong there, I was happy that finally I could help someone. That’s where the disappointing time starts that makes me feel like she started to feel that her boyfriend is not enough for her. There is not a single conversation where she would not ask about my husband, sometimes even she skips to say “hallo” and ask straight about my relationship. A couple of weeks ago I’ve changed my status on Facebook from married to nothing but it seems like for other people it was visible as single.

To be honest it does not matter what stands in my relationship status, the question asked was wrong again. The girl took her time explaining herself but what she does not understand is that from my point of view a facebook friend should not ask intimate and private questions. She makes me feel on and on like she is haunting in her thoughts for my husband and she feels jealous that I have him instead of her. And don’t take me wrong. I am not acting on emotions here.It’s my intuition. Even my husband observed a suspicious behaviour of hers. It’s like she tries to compete against me. In the start I thought it was a coincidence, I try to explain it with her narcissistic tendencies that she herself said that she had but now I’ve got enough.

If you think that I am not fair and I act rashly then fine but if someone only creates a relationship with me based on social media and never wants to give that extra from their side, that is not a real friendship. She invited me to a beach in Nacka but as I could not go because my kids are out of controll at times I’ve asked her to come to Nynäshamn which is not that far for someone that you really consider a friend but she declined. The only time she pops up is when something is happening between me and Ahad. Then she asks me questions which are really uncomfortable.

Today I’ve reached the limit. I thanked her for the memories and blocked her everywhere. Because I don’t want people to sniff around my relationship. My relationship may be visible in the media, our youtube channel but whatever we don’t show online we want to save for ourselves. It’s our private matter how things go between us and we do not need a third party. Even in friendships there are boundaries which you should not cross.

Why I feel so worried about it? Well. In high school there was a boy that I really really liked. I’ve introduced him and one of my friends. My friend was supposed to get some information about what the guy thinks about me. I wasn’t very brave at that time and I did not know a shit about dating or romance. Few weeks after my birthday they became a couple behind my back. She only has told me once they were together. I flipped. I even felt like jumping in front of a train that time. She hurt my self-esteem and I had a very difficult time making friends with girls since then. Forget trust. I was to afraid to do that for over a decade. Too be honest I felt that boys and men are better as friends. At least they don’t bullshit and say as it is.

Thus my dear readers, I’ve taken a step back. I choose loneliness once again. Good news is that at least I can trust myself. I will never touch anyone’s man.

See ya !

The nation with best hospitality ?

Today, while scrolling facebook feed I found a post where a person asked to mention a country in the comment that has the best hospitality. Automatically many people became engaged, joining the race of who is the best, selling lies to those that do not know the reality. My answer was the most realisitic of all – ” I don’t think it exist…” .

And with all honesty I stand by my words because how can you call yourself a hospitable nation when there are homeless people on the streets of your country, either just giving up their life or begging for money. Poland has homeless people and Sweden does too but when people of white color arrive to a more poor country automatically these people become kings, not because of the best hospitality or because people love to help others but because they smell money and favors. How sad it sounds, doesn’t it?

And yet, its the cruel truth. No money and no power, means no heartwarming gestures, free food or drinks. There will be barely anyone wanting to shake your hand or even look at you. You will become an invisible background, no one will question why you are where you are and how you got yourself there.

(Photo by David Atkins on

There is another lesson that comes with my discovery. People seems extremely hungry when it comes to being the best, the most beautiful, having the best things. Why? Because they have lived their whole life looking at the wrong examples of a human, chasing dreams and illusions instead of becoming a proper woman or a man. A person that does not fight about titles knows that it is the best he or she could be. Why engaging in the rat race? What do you gain by that?

Thank you & see you …

Human made stories about religions and the truth

Since two days I’ve been innerly struggling because of this topic. I really hate myself for getting involved in the Polish community abroad – forums. It always makes my blood to boil. In a negative way of course. Being very intelligent and aware of things does not make me feel better about this topic. It makes it worse because every time I realize that I was born on the same soil as them. I question myself what went wrong that I am treating my neighbour as I would treat myself but they cannot. They put blame on others, call them names “Ciapak”, “Terorysta”.

Jesus was a jew, his mother too. They were not white. How can these so called “true” Polish citizens call themselves Christians or Catholics ? They are abusing the Gods son while trying to show authority over citizens of other nations and believers of other religions. Because that is what we believe that Jesus is. A jewish man born to die for our sins on the cross. From my point of view he was a fool to die for all of us. We did not deserve his sacrifiece. We became more egositic, more matrerialistic and fake. We hurt people all week, then on Sunday we pretend to be super religious just to show off we are “Catholic”, just as if religion was something created to obtain good name and fame in society. Sorry to disappoint you all, its not !

I have a big fear of God. Even though people (at least from Poland) will not see it while trying to analyze my behaviour I am extremely into reading Holy scripts. Blame my elders for buying me a Bible every occasion they got. I really read into it and to me its not plain text. Its teachings which I respect and inspiration which I turned into my own book of priciples which I follow in life. To me its not about going to church. That does not make me feel the satisfaction of being a good human. I want to do good to humankind. Do charities and be involved with my body and soul. Not only for the good of Polish people but even people from coutries in Asia, Africa or South America. I know many of you will not understand me. Not everyone has the same inclinations as me. By it I mean being involved with the people of other ethnitcities and religious beliefs. To me they are all the same despite their outer shell. They can do as much good and bad as all of us.

So you probably start wondering what exactly triggered this “fire” in me. So two days ago while scrolling through my facebook page I’ve noticed a poster with missing children. I went inside to read and since the children were probably held in Pakistan somewhere by their dad according to the mother in Poland which registered the kids missing I decided to help. I am married to a Pakistani that still lives in Pakistan after all. Then I got to read this bullshit. To be honest many unnecessary comments which did not have to do with the case or could help in any way. One lady was eagerly trying to convince everyone that its a tradition for the people following Islam to kidnap their kids. Then she started saying that Quran teaches that the father has ownership over the kids. There is not such thing, maybe before but not now. Many countries that follow Islam try to undestand Quran from a new prespective and apply it in the society in a way that will not go against all human rights. Not everyone succeeds but they try. In Islam there is a religious leader just like we have a Pope, who with other Islamic scholars decides on the guidelines which are applied in the societies. Not everyone agrees on all changes. Some are more narrow-minded than others but there has been some improvements. And we shall remember that just like we Christians all around the world have different custom, its an individual thing in the islamic societies as well. They have group pressure of course but its just like we have it without noticing that we have. Remember we lost the right to abortion in Poland in 2019 ? Thats because of the Christian scholars in Poland that planned this with the prime minister. To make Poland an example of a “highly” religious society which it is not. Its totally against human rights and moreover against the EU-regulations.

While searching for evidence that there is no such fu**ing rule as father owning kids I found this file. Feel free to read it. Its very interesting and its interprets Qurans verses about child custody from different perspectives which I like. We shoud always question things before we decide on our final statements.

People please , lets not spread hate through social media! Its not healthy.

Since I mention the child abduction case to you, I know many people in Pakistan follow me so please if you know anything about the wareabouts of Sadia (9 yrs) or Ahmed (6 yrs) or even their dad Saleem Muhammad that was lastly seem with the kids in Sialkot, Pakistan call to the following numbers : +48 883 859 092 , +48 570 897 432 or PM me on any of the social medias I have so I can convey the message to the person that is in contact with the kids mother.

The kids were supposed to return back home in Poland on 29/9 but they never showed up at the airport. They were lastly in contact on 27/9 at around 3 PM (Polish time I suppose) . I am not sure what is the back story of this case. If the couple had a good understanding before the kids even went to Pakistan so have in mind that there could be other circumstances which led to disappearance of Saleem, Sadia and Ahmed before you throw a fist at someone or drag them to police station.

To Polish people that will probably start making up things and drive me crazy with their antiforeigner propaganda… Read this:

Tommorows post will be on the injustice, propaganda and unfairness regarding the term “terrorist”. I’m gonna make you think. A lot.

Until tommorow!

Peace ✌ & Love ❤