Today was really exhausting. Not because I did so much but rather because I ate so much I feel like I will blast at any moment. A way to start a new year 😂… Yeah, but all fun aside. This day started with a disappointment and seems to be ending with one.
Mr.Prajwol Thapa won the prize of the most disappointing father on earth today. He did not show up few days ago when he left saying to the children “See you later! ” and he did not show up yesterday, not today although the kids talk to him at lunch time and he confirmed that they will see him in the evening today. So again, we have celebrated this year without their dad. And I don’t think I can manage to drink another non-alcoholic bubble drink tommorow so its on Mr. Thapa.
When it comes to me, I am gonna indulge in my dreams and planning of a trip, although the funding is still not there but I really wish to take the kids to Vienna. I wonder if I will get the same feeling I had before. Like that it’s my home. Personally, I feel Vienna is somehow bigger than Stockholm. And according to Google I don’t seem to be wrong. Vienna is more than 400 km2, while Stockholm is barely 190 km2 and most of it are the lakes and forests. It would be so awesome to be in Vienna last night. Fireworks while walking over the Danube river. It must have been magic.
Source : duschelapartments.com
See this… magic 🥰
I used to walk on the bridge at night, looking at those big buildings and say that once I start living in Vienna, Im gonna work in one of those offices or maybe even own one. I dreamed quite big, maybe thats why it remained my dream and I even lost the friendship I tried so hard to keep. But who knows. Jupiter will be in Aries, my 9th house this year. I am gonna get lucky once again. Pretty soon.
And you know what… I am going to end this day with some movie time with my kiddos.
I cannot believe that I’ve actually slept today without waking up in the middle of the night. I guess I was exhausted but on the other side its good with a little rest. I did not have enough these days and I still need to keep my fighting spirit up. The last 30 days has been filled with many challenges and confusions especially for Austin and Aaron. I had to gather the last piece of energy yesterday and decided to take them out. They were eager to go to the Maritime Museum. We made a stop at McDonalds first.
Of course a little bit of plastic was definitely more interesting than the food 😂 … But somehow we managed to leave after 1 hour, happy and few pounds heavier.
Aaron and Austin were happy to look around the museum. They even found a place where they could play.
Them being happy despite the circumstances we adults are in is probably the greatest gift a parent can get. I would feel totally devastated if I would be the reason behind tears.
The visit did not last long. They got pretty much bored running around so I’ve decided to use that energy and take a walk back to Stockholm City. This was the first time they walked 3 km with me. Austin got pretty much exhausted and fell asleep as soon as I put him in the stroller. Aaron still had some energy and took a last picture with the lion statue .
But well…even the most energetic child gets tired…
Any last words?
Well… if you want to teach your kids something and want them to explore all sides of life go to museums, theaters, cinemas. Spend time with them. Having parents involved in their activities will make them grow into independent individuals. They will be more expressive and willing to challenge their boundries. If you like taking walks like me, take your kids with you. Aaron and Austin became very innovative on the way. They used the street lightening and benches to create a game where they collected points by running and touching them.
I am not sure where I am right now, transit wise. But it kind of feels like Mercury is coming slowly. But I am scared at the moment to make any guesses. I’m trying to be optimistic but it does not belong to the easiest tasks right now. As you may have guessed after reading my previous post I got misunderstandings with some family members or more likely my grandmom. I love my grandmom but there are few things which I cannot accept and that is her desire to know everything and the way she makes things out of context.
Yesterday, she kept messaging me about my ex and my cousins birthday and I’ve told her to leave me alone because I am not in a place to feel anything. Then she interpreted this as me being controlled by my husband Ahad. I got really upset about this because he does not have anything to do with my current situation that I need to go through. In the end, although I was very hesitant I had to tell her that I got issues at work. I am certain that many people know by now and that does not feel great because I am innocent but people will always use this misfortunate event to poke where it hurts.
Today wasn’t that great either. Prajwol called the kids but of course it was more for his family than himself as he did not talk to the children more than 5 minutes in total. Moreover, both his cousin Suraj and his brother Ujjwal kept making fun of my child. Today I got so upset I tried to correct their behaviour and guess what Mr. Thapa did… he cut the damn call! How can a father do that to a child? Of course I did not leave it alone. I sent him a message to stop this bullshit. Why does a poor child have to listen to someone elses seek perception on body image ? He is just 5 years. Why does a 5 years old need to think how much it is okay to eat and what he should be eating?! I wouldn’t make it a big issue if not for that Aaron is very sensitive to criticism and I am scared he will not want to eat or even worse, start binge eating like I did in my childhood. I really hate that coldness that comes from Prajwol Thapas eyes. It will never change. I’ve lost totally all respect for him at that moment.
I hope that if you see any adult bullying a child or criticizing their body weight or eating habits you will step forward. Of course healthy eating should be encouraged but there is a way to say it. Awakening fears and guilt is not a way to go.