Do you miss a friend as well ?

Good Saturday to you all!

Since I got the news that I will be representing EU Careers at my university, I got motivated to grab my old German books. I have joined a few forums to keep my writing skills alive. I still feel that I have a long way to go but I have explored as well that I can express myself on various topics in German which feels totally „ toll“ (A German word for amazing). I am about to know 4 languages, in speaking and writing. I suppose I am the first one in the Ratajczak generation.

The biggest subject that makes me driven to learn is well… my old friend. My Venus matured at the time when I met him and I started making a requirement list of what I need to feel happy. I met him at the time when I completely drown in agony. And what I felt at that time when we spend time together made a huge impact on me and thus I cannot forget him or the feeling I had and the transformation I went through in 2019/2020. I believe that we will meet one day… when I become stronger, wiser and more financially and emotionally stable. To reconnect and have exchange of thoughts which in my perspective did not go the right way the last time we spoke.

My Ahad asked me yesterday what was bothering me, if he should contact Shahzad for me but I declined. I am not ready and probably the man is still not ready as well to understand his mistakes or even why I am so obsessed over our past. But I do plan to drop by Vienna by the end of the year or at least before my 30th birthday. I would really like to attend the language test at ÖSD and try for B1 or B2. On the same time I could walk on the bridge over the Danube river and remind myself of the beautiful memories I made there. Every time I went there it felt like home. And perhaps while walking without a clear destination we will cross our paths once again…

Nevertheless… Bis Bald ! Vielen Dank fürs Lesen!

Tschüss 👋

Separate but together. Happy 1st marriage anniversary!

Hello my dear readers!

How are you ? Cuz…I am dead tired to be honest 😂 But even when I am tired I still have some moments in my life that bring me joy. Meeting my husband is one of these moments. Before I tell you the story of our first face to face meeting let me tell you about today.

Today reminded me pretty much about that day one year ago with the exception I was running late for my work, the SL app stopped working and then my SL ticket vanished but at last I made it. Indeed I felt for a moment like I am cursed and started wishing for a better wedding anniversary next year because what if it starts becoming a tradition, me having constantly issues with traffic and technology on that day. But then I thought that I am quite lucky. The bus driver let me in so I could go to Globen, later the metro stuff let me through the gates so I could take the train to Skanstull where I had been working these past two days. Then luckily Clarion Sign Hotel had free internet so I could ask for help and so I called the SL customer service and luckily even though I reinstall the SL app they could find my ticket and activate it again. Even when my life leads me to the feeling of hopelessness I gather the courage to believe that God will never leave a person in need and so it send me all this angels.

And then we come to my hubby and our marriage…marriage anniversary. I wish this day could be celebrated in the most colorful way but I suppose we are meant to work hard first and then enjoy the fruits of our labour. We celebrate separately but still together. I came to a conlusion that we should celebrate each day we are together rather just some specific days. Being married is a celebration itself is what I feel. I think I am learning some important things about long lasting commitment. I am not sure if I would see it the same way if we had lived together at once but that’s how I see it today.

I still remember that day, the day I held Ahads hand for the first time. It was very warm, soft but on the same time strong. It felt as if he couldn’t believe that I actually am there holding his hand. The plane landed in early morning. It was still very dark outside. But we still could see our faces and well, we gave each other awkward looks because we talked about kissing on the airport but with all people around looking at my white face it just felt too much overwhelming. So I just sat inside the car holding Ahads hand, we kept laughing and hugging. Probably at 2/3 of the way back to his home I kissed him. I just felt the tension was too much. I cannot handle nervous people 🤣. He was so much tired and lost somewhere in his thoughts he did not understand what he was doing nor what’s happening. We arrived at his home by 4 or 5 AM. All family members greeted me. They were super excited I guess. I was so tired I just changed my dress and went to sleep with Fatima in her room. I did not even have the strength to talk much. I fell asleep very quickly but probably did not managed to sleep more than 5-6 hours that day. When I wake up Ahad was feeling a little better and wasn’t so awkward with me anymore. It felt like I am seeing a small kid getting a christmas gift. He was just too much excited and overwhelmed by me being there. And as today is our anniversary, I really really miss him. But probably we will need to wait for some time to meet up again. I truly hope to celebrate one of our birthdays together this year or next year. I will work really hard for it to come true. So hold thumbs for me.

Happy Wedding anniversary to us ! Cheers!

See you soon with a new post my dear brothers and sisters !

Being prejudiced does not equal love

Good morning my dear readers!

I want to start this post by saying that I’ve missed you all 🤗 . I know it hasn’t been long since the last published post but I’ve really had an intense weekend and only today I feel like it’s all fine. Of course my life without astrology would be boring so let me tell you that I feel the energy of Mercury quite a lot these days.

You may suffer due to health complications. You will find it difficult to retain money as you will have tendency towards spending on luxuries and pleasures.This is not a good period for indulging in rash speculative activities. Silly quarrels, misunderstanding and arguments can affect family’s peace and serenity. People jealous of you can cause problems, thus may get un-based accusations and create unhappiness in the family beware of them. You may have trouble from opposite gender so you need to be careful of them.

That’s pretty much what life has been these days. I fought with my mother, my uncle and even Ahad has gone through some intense time with his family during the same time. But this post is not about who fought who but rather why and what should we do in this kind of situations.

Last week as you know I went to work on Monday and then I took a leave for the rest of the week. I just felt too much overwhelmed by peoples rash decisions and their judgemental attitudes. As you also got to know I went to a police station. And that’s not for just any issue. I went to ask for advice as in my situation I really cannot make a rash decision. If relationships are like a building then you probably understand that it takes a lot of time to build but once it breaks it takes too much time to get it fixed. After all it’s about human life. No one wants to live in a building that can collapse at any time and endenger your health or life. And so it was the reason I went to police station as well. To know my rights and to see the problem I’ve been facing since a long time through the eyes of law practicing individuals.

What I got to know is that calling people names like “Muslim witch” or being critical towards others without any justified reason falls in the section of molestation and slander. If someone discriminates you and abuses you mentally, that’s molestation as well. If they tell you that they regret that they haven’t thrown stones at you, that’s a crime.

That’s what the Swedish law says about it :

1 § brottsbalken. Den som utpekar någon såsom brottslig eller klandervärd i sitt levnadssätt eller eljest lämnar uppgift som är ägnad att utsätta denne för andras missaktning, dömes för förtal till böter.

7 § brottsbalken. Den som fysiskt antastar någon annan eller utsätter någon annan för störande kontakter eller annat hänsynslöst agerande döms, om gärningen är ägnad att kränka den utsattes frid på ett kännbart sätt, för ofredande till böter eller fängelse i högst ett år.

To call someone different names that hurt that person’s integrity is a crime in the law of Sweden. It is even a crime to put on other’s crimes and actions which are far from the truth. Those commiting the crime of slander can be punished by penelty. Those that pshysically or mentally try to hurt another individual can be sentenced to payment of penelties or up to 1 year of jail. Of course the crime will be in the register for a few years at least.

So what is this post really about?

It’s about teaching other’s that love and care is not calling your girlfriend, boyfriend, husband wife, mother, father or children all kinds of insulting names. Tha’ts actually in the light of law a very serious crime. And just because I do not report you at this very moment does not mean you have the right to keep doing this all kinds of unjustified actions or say all this mean things.

Because the truth is I may have married a hindu, then a muslim but I’ve always been me. And the me I know has never wanted to harm anyone. And so I do right now but there are boundries which you should never cross if you really care about someone. Doing things and abusing someone mentally or physically because of a prejudiced mind is not love. Prejudice will always stay prejudice until proved being the truth.

Why waste time and destroy beautiful connections because of your weaknesses?

That I still do not understand but I know that once I cannot tolerate anymore how people try to keep looking inside my pants, wallet and my health card index next time I will enter the police building not to ask questions but to file a complaint againt the perpetrator. It does not matter if its my mother, uncle or anyone other family member. I have right to feel safe. I have right to live my life the way I want. I have right to eat what I want, dress however I want and marry whoever I want.

Thank you for reading !

✨ Wishing you a productive week ✨